There is no such thing as loving yourself or loving someone else. When you touch the sweetness of love, you will naturally be loving towards everyone and everything. In love, you will naturally be kind to yourself & others.
The nature of love
Love is like a fragranced flower, it will give its fragrance to all equally. It doesn’t matter how you look at the flower, you can frown or smile, it will not discriminate. The flower will continue to be fragrant, it will continue to give its fragrance. But not everyone will experience the fragrance in the same way, someone might be standing at a distance, someone might have a blocked nose, the reasons can be plentiful. In the same way, the nature of love will not discriminate, you will be loving to all effortlessly but not all will be open to receiving your love.
“In- love you look at everything lovingly, be it a tree, a person, a glass of water, a saint or murderer.”
Where is love found?
Love is always found within, it is always experienced within you. Love is sitting within you, waiting for you to access it. There are studies to show that you’re more likely to be open to receiving & giving love if you have experienced loving care as a child, meaning that love is easier to access when sparked from your surroundings. This doesn’t mean love can’t be experienced if you’ve had a childhood of neglect or it doesn’t mean an external spark is the only way.
Accessing love
Why do you feel love for a particular person but don’t always feel that love for everyone else? In life, there will be certain people that allow you to find that love within yourself. Someone might treat you a certain way, which then allows you to experience love, but the possibility of touching love within yourself was always there. It’s normally at this point, you’ll tell that person you love them. The majority of the time this is happening unconsciously, so you say things that you don’t fully understand. What would sound more accurate is something like, “There is something about you, that allows me to experience love.”
Becoming reliant
The issue arises when you become reliant on the other person in taking you back to experiencing love because most often you don’t know how to stay in that state. The other person will have many other aspects to their personality and will not remain consistent in providing you with what gave you access to experiencing love. This can start causing frustration and feeling low as you’re now living with the expectation for the other person to fulfil you. Many people live their entire life waiting in frustration for others to provide them with love, not realising they have access to it within their very self.
A little practice
Sit in silence with your eyes closed, mentally start to remove everything you identify with one-by-one. You don’t need to throw them away, just create a distance. Doing this regularly, you will realise behind all the layers, you’re love.
What it means to find love.
In love, you look at everything lovingly, be it a tree, a person, a glass of water, a saint or murderer. In love, there is no reason, in love there is no desire, in love you are complete. When you’re in love, you become like a fragranced flower that gives out the fragrance of love. You don’t need to plan a speech, you don’t need to work anything out, you’re simply love, spreading your fragrance. In love you don’t become exhausted & tired of giving, because you aren’t giving, you’re just being.
~ Baljit Singh
